Cinco, cinco y no le llegaba a diez.

Five plus five, and still, he/she don't get to ten.

Even with two PhDs and a Lexus (he/she) is still a beer short of a six pack.

Barriga llena, Corazon contento.

A full stomach, results in a contented heart. Yup, if the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, then the faster you fill it, the faster you will own his heart. Fat men are happy men.

No se puede peer con chorro.

You can't fart when you have the runs. Think of this as a dictum. The same guy that ate the first artichoke carved this into the tablets that Moses got from the burning bush. Heads up to all those multi taskers: there's times when you shouldn't even try to do two things at once. A man should know his limits. YMMV.